Playing Ultimate Body Blows on a PC keyboard reveals instantly why fighting fans in 1994 had such a fraught relationship with computer brawlers. Team17 jammed two complete arcade-style rosters into a single package, creating a massive 22-fighter clash that was equal parts ambitious and mechanically stubborn.

Single-button joystick legacies ruin a good keyboard fight

If you boot up this action game expecting the smooth directional inputs of arcade champions, your hands are in for a shock. The engine was originally built around standard one-button joysticks, which meant holding down your single attack button and pushing a direction to execute different special moves. When translated to MS-DOS hardware, that setup morphed into an awkward array of cluster keys like W/E/R, S/D, and Z/X/C, leaving players struggling to perform basic special attacks while dodging incoming fire.

The pacing of every match revolves around a peculiar button-lock system designed as a mercy mechanic. When you knock an opponent flat onto the canvas, your attack controls lock up entirely until they pull themselves back up. You cannot crowd a rising opponent for an instant wake-up hit, nor can you string together true multi-hit combos or grab a blocking enemy, because the engine omits throw mechanics altogether. Every round breaks down into a rhythmic game of spacing, jumping over fireballs, and trading high-damage special moves from across the stage.

A roster of 22 fighters brings wild variety and brutal AI

Combining the original 1993 game with its sci-fi sequel expanded the selectable lineup into an absolute carnival of character concepts. Beside standard street brawlers like the twin martial artist heroes Dan and Nik, you get a cyclone-powered businessman named Mike, a monk named Lo-Ray, an electrified Russian giant named Kossak, and a wrestler named Dug. Crossing over into the space-themed content introduces alien creatures, cyborgs, and dinosaurs across 24 distinct background stages ranging from sandy wrestling rings to foreign planet surfaces.

Computer-controlled opponents exploit every mechanical advantage they can find, making single-player matches an exercise in patience. Enemy AI routinely spams high-speed projectiles and instant-teleport techniques the moment you step into range. Defeating later opponents often means finding a single reliable special move and abusing the computer's pathfinding quirks rather than trying to play a clean tactical match.

• No Throws or Combos: Blocking is extremely effective because command grabs do not exist anywhere in the engine.
• Mercy Lockout: Attack buttons freeze while your opponent recovers from a knockdown, preventing oppressive pressure.
• Boss Playability: The final boss Max and his true form T17 can be unlocked via cheat codes, though running campaign mode as T17 triggers a bug that prevents the ending sequence from loading.

Audio flair and studio feuds give the DOS release real personality

While console purists criticized the stiff animations, the presentation on PC delivered genuine punch thanks to its audio setup. Sound Blaster cards blasted out a synth-heavy soundtrack composed by Allister Brimble and Danny Burke, giving every match an energetic driving beat that outpaced many arcade conversions of the era. The VGA graphics filled the screen with bright sprites, even if their movement lacked the extra animation frames seen in top-tier arcade cabinets.

Developer and publisher Team17 built a reputation for defensive pride, which spilled directly into the software itself. After taking sharp criticism from magazines like Amiga Power, the team inserted easter egg cheat codes into their games, letting players type in the name of the offending publication to trigger hostile messages or joke effects. That defiant attitude permeates the game, right down to the absurdly overpowered final boss, Max.

Stiff mechanics hold it back, but the character chaos is worth a look

Judged strictly as a competitive fighter, it feels stiff today. The rigid move lists, complete absence of grabs, and clunky keyboard mapping keep it far from the arcade giants of 1994. Still, it captures a loud, aggressive slice of European PC design, jamming an enormous array of absurd fighters into one disk box.

You can play Ultimate Body Blows online free in your browser right now, with no installation or setup required. Most modern players expect traditional quarter-circle stick inputs, so the biggest surprise when playing this Ultimate Body Blows MS-DOS game today is discovering that holding your attack key while tapping directions is how you launch special attacks. Fire up a match, pick an alien or a cyclone-toting suit, and see how long you survive against the computer's ruthless projectile spam.